Dear writer,
Landed that bookstore signing? Past workshop attendee Kelsey Timmerman has his hilarious take on why he'd just as soon be doing a small book club in someone's living room:
And let's face it, there's a lot we can be doing, but only a smaller subset of that is what we really should be doing.
Erma once wrote that she saved $30 clipping coupons. "By having coupons," she continued, "I got an extra carton of cat food ... and extra bucket of swmming-pool chemicals ... an extra carton of infant strained lamb ... and a huge savings on calf's liver. The only problem was we didn't have a cat, a swimming pool, or a baby, and we all hated liver."
She and Kelsey are on the same wavelength here: Know the goal. Mine right now has been pulling together a workshop worthy of the ones we've offered in the past, and I'm excited about where we are. Here are a few updates.
Dates: The 2010 workshop will be offered April 15-17, as always on the campus of Erma's alma mater, the University of Dayton in Ohio.
Keynotes: We have some spectacular speakers lined up, among them:
* Gail Collins of the New York Times (and author of America's Women: 400 Years of Dolls, Drudges, Helpmates, and Heroines and the forthcoming When Everything Changed: The Amazing Journey of American Women from 1960 to the Present)
* Longtime David Letterman writer Bill Sheft (author of Everything Hurts and Time Won't Let Me)
* Fox morning host Steve Doocy (author of Tales From the Dad Side: Misadventures in Fatherhood and The Mr. & Mrs. Happy Handbook: Everything I Know About Love and Marriage (with corrections by Mrs. Doocy))
Registration: Expect it to open in early September. We've sold out the last couple of workshops in just a few days, so be sure to get your registration in early if you plan to attend.
There's still a lot to do: Rounding out the keynote schedule, planning workshop sessions, working with the Washington-Centerville Public Library on the writing competition, and figuring out what more we can do to make the workshop even better, perhaps by adding some informal breakfast roundtables and a screening of the PBS documentary on Erma.
If you've got ideas for what you'd like to see or hear more about at the next workshop, please share them. I can't promise we'll be able to do them all, but I can promise they'll get a fair hearing. As I said, it's a question of separating out what we can be doing from what we should be doing. If we're doing alright, we won't end up with gallons of swimming-pool chemicals and pounds of calf liver.
The latter, I solemnly promise, will not be served at the workshop in April.
Keep writing,
Matthew Dewald
Workshop director
Newsletter not enough? Share ideas, swap leads, get unvarnished advice and blow off some steam with fellow humor writers and Bombeck types by joining our Yahoo discussion group.
Published lately? Drop me a note at erma@udayton.edu with relevant links for the next newsletter (and do the new workshop director a favor by mentioning if you're past workshop attendee or speaker).
From Erma’s desk
“I never realized what a holding pattern we were in until I tried to massage my husband's neck and he said, 'I'll save you time. My billfold's on the dresser.'” From Aunt Erma's Cope Book: How to Get from Monday to Friday ... in 12 Days (McGraw-Hill, 1979)
Latest news...
LIFE AS A D-LIST AUTHOR
Kathy Griffin's dreams of becoming a published author get a little uncomfortable when the staffers at Random House ask her to name some of her favorite authors. See the video here.
CURLING UP WITH A KINDLE
With Kindle sales accounting for 35 percent of Amazon's book sales, the Miami Herald asks, "Will electronic devices make books obsolete?"
DUDE LOOKS LIKE A LADY
The woman behind the huge UK hit "Holly's Inbox," which draws comparisons to Bridget Jones' Diary, turns out to be 40-year-old Bill Surie. As in William. As in him.
WHAT'S SO FUNNY?
Armpit gags. Body noises. For kids, funny stuff. But why? Some experts say parents should let them yuck it up for the good of their health.
BILLIE JEAN IS NOT MY PUBLISHER
Even as music sales of Michael Jackson's back catalog soared last week, books by and about the singer were languishing on shelves, if they were even in print at all.
SPEAKING OF THE KING OF POP
Two Chinese writers "locked themselves up with coffee and cigarettes, no cellphones and no sleep for 48 hours -- and emerged with a finished Michael Jackson biography." Moonwalk in Paradise runs about 130,000 words, no doubt all of them well-chosen.
MAYBE KELSEY'S ONTO SOMETHING
Who goes to book clubs? Authors who want to sell a lot of books, says the Christian Science Monitor.
READY TO SELL MORE BOOKS?
Past workshop faculty member John Kremer, author of 1001 Ways to Market Your Books, is hosting a marketing seminar in Denver later this month. The two-day Book Marketing Blast-Off Seminar is July 30-31. Details here.
GETTING THAT PROMOTIONAL E-MAIL READ
Publishers Weekly offers tips for publishers, authors.
ACADEMIC ERMA
The Osher Lifelong Learning Institute at San Jose State University will offer a 2-hour class on Erma's life and writing Aug. 3.
NEXT ERMA BOMBECK WRITING COMPETITION TO BE HELD IN 2010
The Washington-Centerville Public Library will hold its writer’s competition every other year to coincide with UD’s Erma Bombeck Writer’s Workshop. Past winning essays and competition details are available here.
Markets, contests and more
MONTHLY HUMOR CONTEST
HumorPress.com holds monthly humor writing contests with cash prizes. Read more.
CARTOON CAPTION CONTEST
FUNNY HEADLINE CONTEST
Can you write a hilarious headline? Read more.
SOUP'S STILL ON
The Chicken Soup for the Soul folks continue to look for stories. Upcoming topics include miracles, NASCAR, and teacher tales.
Copyright 2009, University of Dayton
Article archives
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Humor writer
of the month
SUSAN McCORKINDALE
In Confessions of a Counterfeit Farm Girl, Susan McCorkindale tells the story of her move from a high-paying job as a marketing executive with Family Circle to a 500-acre beef cattle farm in rural Virginia. Her husband never looked back, but she does.
If you'd like to be considered as our featured writer, send an e-mail with writing samples or a link to your Web site.
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Who's
publishing
what?
WORKSHOP FACULTY
SWITCHING TO PLAN B
Emmy winner Karyl MIller has a new medium, comics. Check out her new comic strip Plan B here.
TENDER FENDERS
Leigh Anne Jasheway-Bryant has become the humor columnist for the Register-Guard's new Dash magazine for women. You can take a peek here. Her latest writing advice, "Bumper-sticker Wisdom for Writers" will appear in the August 2009 issue of The Writer.
PAST WORKSHOP ATTENDEES
NSNC WINNER
'WRITER, ZOOKEEPER, INCOMPETENT BLOG DESIGNER'
Sherry Stanfa-Stanley keeps it simple on her blog. Her latest entry puts pregnancy in perspective.
NOVELS AND STORIES
The short story "Kudzu's Last Stand" by Cappy Hall Rearick was selected to appear in the Florida Writers Association Collection From Our Family to Yours. Her "A Cellular Christmas" was selected to appear in Christmas Traditions, a collection of holiday stories. Her novel Return to Rocky Bottom was published in April 2009.
WHEN YOU FIND A HAND IN A FREEZER, THEN WHAT?
Gayle Carline's debut novel Freezer Burn can answer that question for you. It will be released in August by Echelon Press. Her weekly column continues to appear in the Placentia Times-News.
OTHER PUBLISHING NEWS
ON STAGE
Sarah Maizes, who is a member of the our Yahoo discussion group, will be performing in the Los Angeles production of "Expressing Motherhood," which runs Aug. 1 through Aug. 9. More info here.
IN PRINT
Jim Mize sold a back page story for the summer 2009 issue of Sandlapper Magazine about two fisherman who discovered they had a dog in common. Similar stories appear in his collection The Winter of Our Discount Tent, published by the University of South Carolina Press.
GOT ANY GOOD LAWYER JOKES?
A two-act play by attorney Lawrence Fox, author of The Confused Lawyer's Field Guide to the Courthouse, will be produced by the Pennsylvania Playhouse in Bethlehem, Penn., in the last week of August.
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Favorite articles
The structure of humor
Using formats in your writing allows you to produce material faster and funnier -- and sell more pieces. Read more.
Selling to regional
parenting magazines
Brette McWhorter Sember's kit provides an easy way to sell reprints.
Freelance selling
Until you sell your work, you're not a freelance writer. You're just a writer. Read more.
Secrets of the best seller lists
It's all a game, and the cards are stacked in favor of the big New York publishers, who have the money to promote new titles and generate a burst of sales. Read more.
Startling statistics
So you want to write a book. Well, why not? So does about 80 percent of the United States population according to a survey by the Jenkins Group. Read more.
Move over, Grisham...
Author Judy Gruen has some interesting -- and humorous --ideas about how to promote her new book. Read more.
Injecting humor
into your writing
Author Mary Emma Allen shows how to find the humor in everyday life. Read more.
Write brain
closed for business
Tired of having people assume you can write anything, anywhere? Deb DiSandro is, too. Read more.
25 ways to market your book
Connie Corcoran Wilson shares how she promoted her book, "Both Sides Now." Read more.
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2008 workshop
sponsors
Erma Bombeck
Writers Workshop
Endowment
created by Ralph and Cindy Price Hamberg in memory of her cousin Brother Tom Price, S.M.
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All about Erma
FIRST DOCUMENTARY ABOUT ERMA BOMBECK
When 350 writers saw the premiere of the first documentary produced about Erma Bombeck's life, they were quick to applaud her legacy.
ERMA BOMBECK'S HUMOR STILL LOVED A DECADE AFTER HER DEATH by Jim Hannah, Associated Press
She kept homemakers in stitches with her writing on marriage, kids, dirty dishes and how to hang the toilet paper. Ten years after Erma Bombeck's death, her humor still has an audience. Read more.
ERMA BOMBECK: FROM COPYGIRL TO SUPER HUMOR COLUMNIST
Born in Dayton in 1927, Erma Bombeck began her writing career in junior high school writing columns in "The Owl," the newspaper for Emerson Junior High. Read more.
REMEMBERING ERMA BOMBECK by Terry Marotta
It's 10 years now that Erma's been gone. The great humor columnist whose work once appeared in some 900 newspapers died the 22nd of April, 1996, and I for one have never stopped missing her. Read more.
YOU CAN WRITE!
Erma slipped a humorous essay under the office door of Brother Tom Price, a UD English professor who served as faculty adviser to the literary magazine, The Exponent. "He said to me three magic words: `You can write,'" Erma recalled. Read Erma's essay.
ERMA ON WRITING
In an interview with Erma, which was published in the Winter 1991 issue of the University of Dayton Quarterly, Erma explained her writing process. Read more.
EFFIE, ERMA'S
ROYAL PORTABLE
Erma wrote using a typewriter for her entire career. While attending the University of Dayton, Erma used a Royal portable that she affectionately called, "Effie." Read more.
'SCUSE ME WHILE
I BAKE A PIE
Jimi Hendrix played at Woodstock. Erma Bombeck cooked with chicken stock. Jimi set his guitar on fire. Erma set a few roasts on fire. The similarities are endless. Read more.
MERRY WIVES AND OTHERS
So, you hated history in high school. This history of domestic humor writing will pique your interest. It includes many speakers from past Erma Bombeck Writers' Workshop, including Art Buchwald, P.S. Wall and Liz Carpenter. Read more.
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